I don't know about you, but letting go of my kids has been really hard to do. From letting them go out of my site when they are young and playing outside, to seeing them drive off on their own for the very first time. Letting go isn't just something you do when your kids go off to college or get married though. It is a process that begins earlier in the teenage years.
I have a friend in the Marine Corps that always says "trust but verify." Trusting that your kids will be o.k. and that they will make the right decisions when they are out of your site isn't easy. Even trusting God is hard to do when you give up control. But it's something that we just have to do in order for our kids to thrive on their own. This is one of those things that is easier said than done. I think what my friend means is trust your kids to do the right thing - that you have raised them in a way to do the right thing - but, in the off chance they do make a wrong choice, verify that they made it to where they were supposed to be. Now that may not seem like trust at all. It isn't. But letting them out of your sight in the first place is an act of trust. Trust can be broken, however. When that happens it takes a long time to be built back up, but that is also part of the learning process.
Chap Clark wrote a book called Hurt several years ago now. While teaching in the most diverse area of the United States, he was also doing a study to see what the common thread was that successful teenagers shared. Spoiler alert: his conclusion was that they had, on average, five positive adult role models in their lives. Those positive adults could be a coach, teacher, youth leader, etc. The hard reality is when it comes to raising successful teenagers, it takes a village. We can't be lone rangers. There are really good people out there who, like you, want the best for your teen. I know this isn't always the case, but for the most part it is. I am so thankful that our daughter has had several people in her life: her grandparents, a few teachers, and her small group leader at our church. Sometimes it takes other people saying the same thing you are in order for your teen to hear it.
The earlier in your teen's life you start trusting, the better off they will be in the long run. Trust God first and foremost. He wants what's best for your child too. Trust your teen (but verify!). Trust some positive adult role models. Your teenager needs to be autonomous. Starting to trust them with small things allows them to build the confidence they need to spread their wings and fly!
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