I don't know about you, but growing up I experienced a bully in my life. It took place in middle school. I was skinny, had red hair, acne and was of average size. The bully was strong, popular and a lineman on our football team. For whatever reason, he chose to pick on me. I avoided him in the halls when I could. On one particular occasion in high school we were in the ski club together. While on one of the ski runs, he shoved me off the side of a cat trail. Finally, I think he grew up and left me alone the second half of high school. That was hard to go through, but even harder is watching your kid go through it.
In a small way we have already experienced it with one of our kids. There's not much you can do other than listen and support your child. You can't retaliate unless you want to end up in prison. Encouraging your kid to retaliate is allowing them to stoop to the bully's level.
King David had a bully before he was crowned king. Saul was jealous of David because, as one of Saul's generals, he was getting more praise from the people than Saul was. David had rescued the army from certain slavery to the Philistines because of a giant named Goliath by single-handedly slinging a stone into the giant's forehead. With the Lord's help of course. As a musician he had also calmed the king's anxious spirit within him by playing the harp. At one time, Saul loved David. But then he allowed his pride to get in the way and he wanted to kill him.
Saul had been pursuing David for quite a while. David had some men (around 600) join him to protect him. On one occasion, David and his men were hiding in a deep, dark cave in En Gedi. Saul just happened to be near that cave and needed to use the restroom. Saul entered the cave, no body guard, no armor or sward. Just Saul. David's men encouraged him that the Lord had handed his enemy over to David. What bullied person wouldn't pray for this - the chance to retaliate? But David wouldn't do it. Instead, he cut off the corner of Saul's robe and let him know he had the chance to kill him, but didn't. Saul was cut to the heart (for the moment only because he later pursues David again) and went back home.
At this time, I believe, is when David penned the 57th Psalm.
I am in the midst of lions; I lie among ravenous beasts - men whose teeth are spears and arrows, whose tongues are sharp swords (verse 4).
and then,
I will praise you, O Lord, among the nations; I will sing of you among the peoples. For great is your love, reaching to the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies (verses 9-10).
David knew that God was sovereign. He let God be in complete control in this circumstance. Allowing God to be in complete control when your kid is suffering is tough. Naturally, as a parent, we want to take matters into our own hands. My advice to you if your kid is dealing with abuse in this way is pray. Listen to and support your kid while going through this difficult time. Know that the time will be over. Bullies don't last forever. Do what you can within the system. And wait on God.
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